In the wake of yet another tragic act of school violence, we MUST consider what we are STILL doing wrong as a community. There is a lot of rhetoric about how to handle tragedies like this but are we actually being part of the solution? Perhaps therein lies the problem...the KIDS who are committing these acts, the kids who are witnesses and victims of these acts of violence are NOT part of the conversation. Sure, they are screaming, begging, and banging their heads against proverbial walls for us to listen to them...they are even killing each other. So why are they not a part of the conversation? Are we afraid of what they might say? Of what they ARE saying?
We are failing them.
Fact is, they are meant for good.
As humans, we are hardwired for kindness, love, and empathy.
Perhaps, somewhere our own needs are not met and we begin to seek fulfillment any way we can. But as teachers, community members, parents, maybe giving students a purpose WITH their education...giving them a VOICE in their education...giving students the EXPERIENCE OF THEIR OWN VALUE within the context of their education can help.
Give EVERY student a moment to shine.
Give EVERY student a moment of acceptance, joy, worth....
a moment to matter.
What does that mean? Everyone needs to feel that they are significant in a positive way to the world they live in. They need hope and support and a feeling that no matter what is happening that is out of their control, they have the ability affect a POSITIVE change is critical! They can't be left to feel that they are cornered into no other option but fighting their way out! They can't be ignored.
As teachers, we MUST build these relationships that foster trust, support, and a genuine concern for our kids. We MUST create a culture of validating the real concerns our kids are facing everyday and showing them that we are on their side!
So how do we do this?
1. EVERY SINGLE TEACHER at EVERY SINGLE GRADE LEVEL MUST:
- greet every student by name as they enter your class and celebrate the accomplishments of several students at the beginning of every class. I keep up with their extracurricular sports and musical accomplishments, artistic and gaming interests. I listen to what they share and celebrate with them, in class, as a "family."
- Consider every student in your classroom an expert. Expect every expert to contribute at least once during a class period. They need to feel that their contribution is NECESSARY for the advancement of learning in your class.
- End the class with appreciations. Thank your students individually and by name for their contributions to the learning that took place. Share what YOU learned from THEM. I created the "Boardroom" part of my classroom specifically for this purpose.
Truly, it is the time we take in SHOWING kids just how much they matter, that will reduce the time we spend shaking our heads when another tragedy strikes.
Yes they will challenge you, yes they will be cynical and skeptical and test your patience, but that challenge will never prevail when the relationship between a student and a teacher is based on consistent, genuine, trust and a value for each other.
